You can dye items by right-clicking (ctrl + clicking for the client version) on the piece of equipment that says it is dyeable, but you need to unlock the option to dye first if you haven't done so already (through a series of quests with Richard in Ashaya Village, backtracking to Coren in the Small Cave in the High Plains to fight Stix for a quest item, which should lead to Sergei in the Energy Forest II place for some more quests, then finally getting to Cale's quest for the Icha's Ire trial which afterwards unlocks the dye option).
Don't forget you need to purchase or obtain a dye powder if you want to change the color of your equipment which some of it is sold through Richard's shop.
The only homes that exist in the game are the cave rooms in Blackwood Caverns, where you can either pay a really large amount of gold once you are level 35, or by doing a series of quests with Laurel there to eventually get a free cave.